This week: It’s a little earlier than advertised, assuming this was actually advertised, because apparently there’s something big happening Sunday. It’s the final stop on the road to Wrestlemania. A week of tying up loose ends, reiterating points, video packages and on location bits. You know the drill here.
RAW SUPERSHOW
– Daniel Bryan and Kane d. Sheamus and Randy Orton (Bryan pinned Sheamus) in 8:33. Bryan didn’t want to start until he got his good luck kiss from AJ. He started with Orton, tagging out the moment Sheamus was brought into the match. A Bryan knee off the apron behind the referee’s back put Sheamus down and allowed the heels to take over, at which point Bryan was willing to get in. Sheamus soon got the tag to Orton, who made his big comeback on Bryan. But as he set up the RKO, Kane pulled Bryan to safety and Orton ended up getting cut off. Orton eventually intercepted Kane’s Chokeslam ideas with a dropkick and tagged Sheamus to fight back on Bryan. Things broke down and Orton was sent into the post by Kane outside. Inside the ring, AJ ran in to prevent a Brogue Kick. The distraction caused Sheamus to miss and Kane to Chokeslam him from the outside, allowing Bryan to pick up the pin fall.
– Cole got in the ring, wearing a Team Johnny t-shirt. Cole announced he was the “official commentator” for Team Johnny and introduced Laurinaitis, who in turn introduced Vickie Guerrero as the “official flag bearer and David Otunga for his match. Booker took it upon himself to name himself Team Teddy’s official commentator and introduce Teddy Long, who brought out Santino and his flag bearer Hornswoggle.
– Santino Marella d. David Otunga in 1:30. Captains match. Otunga used his power early and waved the Team Johnny flag. Hornswoggle came into the ring and waved the Team Teddy flag in retaliation. Otunga tried to hit Hornswoggle with the flag, but he missed and the flag bounced back into his face, allowing Santino to hit the Cobra. Laurinaitis got mad, so Teddy and Santino school yard tripped him. Santino set up for the Cobra. But Miz ran in and gave Santino the Skull Crushing Finale. Leading to Laurinaitis announcing Miz was on Team Johnny. Well, he actually said “Team Teddy” and had to correct himself, because he’s John Laurinaitis. Oh how I laughed.
– Kelly Kelly d. Eve Torres in 2:29. Good news, Eve’s theme music continues to remain intact! Eve dominated, but Kelly missed a moonsault and Kelly rolled her up.
– CM Punk was scheduled to take on Christian. Before the match could get underway though, Jericho showed up on the big screen. He promised to expose Punk for the professional and personal fraud he is. Jericho talked about Punk’s father and sister again. He then brought up some new information, saying that Punk’s parents weren’t married when he was born, meaning he was legally a bastard. Which was pretty weak after the father and sister things. Unfortunate, because this was the one that tipped Punk over the edge. Christian attacked Punk from behind, but Punk kicked Christian’s injured leg and sent him into the announce table head first, repeatedly. Punk hit a roundhouse kick and repeated elbows, before giving Christian a ‘GTS’ on the ring steps and putting him in the Anaconda Vice on the floor, while yelling that this would be Jericho. They announced that Christian was reinjured as a result of this.
– Brodus Clay d. Curt Hawkins in 0:55. Lawler called Curt “Curtis” Hawkins. Hawkins managed to clip Brodus’s knee and get him down briefly. Brodus soon dealt with Hawkins though and put him away with the big splash.
– Big Show d. Primo in 0:47. Big Show was in no mood to play and destroyed Primo, finishing him off with the Chokeslam. Rosa yelled at him and Epico tried to attack from behind, but Big Show gave him the Chokeslam as well. Cody then showed up and told Big Show not to bother trying to catch him, they’d have their time at Wrestlemania. He asked if the word Wrestlemania scared him, because he’d failed time after time. Cody said after Wrestlemania, Big Show’s name would be a verb, for failure. Cody said Big Show would be the biggest fool of all on April 1st.
– The Bellas debated over Team Teddy and Team Johnny backstage. In the background, Drew McIntyre was talking to someone, who may have been Abe Washington, I couldn’t tell. Presumably there’s something to that. Anyway, Zack showed up and managed to insult the Bellas. They left and Eve appeared. Eve suggested they stay at the same hotel in Miami. Zack went for a kiss and Eve said after Wrestlemania.
– Josh tried to interview Punk. Punk told him to ask Christian how he felt. He said he wasn’t off limits, but his family were. Punk claimed what Jericho said about his sister and mother was a lie. He said he wasn’t a bastard, he was the best wrestler in the world.
– Mark Henry d. Great Khali in 0:48. Drew was announced as Christian’s replacement on Team Johnny. Henry ate a Khali chop, but escaped the Punjabi Plunge and delivered a World’s Strongest Slam. After the match, Laurinaitis threw Teddy into the ring and Henry threatened him. The rest of Team Johnny came out to block the aisle, preventing Santino and Zack from making a save. Truth dove into everyone and Kofi managed to hurdle the pile, but flew right into a World Strongest Slam. Finally, Booker could take no more and made the save for Teddy as Henry set him up for the World’s Strongest Slam. Booker hit a Scissors Kick to a big reaction. Teddy then offered Booker the final spot on Team Teddy and Booker T accepted.
– The Rock came out for the main event segment. Rock said since Wrestlemania 20 people had been asking “when are you coming back to Wrestlemania?” He didn’t know when, until last year. Rock said he knew the wait was over when he delievered the Rock Bottom at Wrestlemania 27. He pandered to Atlanta a whole bunch. Rock said there was only man people wanted to see him face at Wrestlemania and it was John Cena. Cena interrupted. He was in wisecracking mood. Cena said he knew he’d get booed at Wrestlemania, but it was nothing new. Cena claimed Rock would never see anything like him. He said he’d spent a year listening to the best trash talker in the business, but he was still here just like he was every night, with a smile on his face. Cena said Rock was the best but he wasn’t the first. He’d dealt with people trash talking him for ten years while Rock was away. The crowd broke into duelling chants and Cena acknowledged them. He said he’d heard them for years and anyone else would turn their back on the fans, but he simply rises above. Not only that, he rises above and he wins, which is what really makes people angry. And he would win at Wrestlemania. Cena said he’d been an active WWE competitor longer than Rock was. And he had been in WWE when it wasn’t so cool, in the good times and the bad times. Cena said he had to win, because Rock would be in GI Joe but WWE would still be Cena’s life. He said he’d be damned if Rock came in as a visitor and took his life from him. He insisted he couldn’t lose, because nobody remembered second place. Rock said Wrestlemania was just as important to him. Rock said he was no visitor, he helped build this house. He said Cena had never had an opponent he couldn’t overcome, until now. Rock said nobody had beaten Hulk Hogan, Steve Austin and John Cena at Wrestlemania. On a professional level, he needed to beat Cena to become the greatest of all time. And on a personal level, he just plain didn’t like him. Rock promised to give Cena the ass kicking of a lifetime. Cena said he would have his hand raised high at Wrestlemania and he’d whip his ass. They went face to face and that’s how Raw ended.
NXT
– Lots of Wrestlemania packages through the next three shows. Needless to say, they were good.
– Hunico d. Derrick Bateman in 5:22. Bateman was accompanied by Kaitlyn. And by accompanied, I mean he gave her a piggyback to the ring. Hunico gave Bateman a hiptoss into the corner, folding Bateman up on his neck. After dominating for the mostpart, Hunico got caught coming off the ropes with a dropkick and Bateman fought back. Bateman took Camacho out with a dive after what seemed like a missed distraction by Camacho. But that allowed Hunico to win with an Olympic Slam.
– Maxine was on the phone backstage. Johnny Curtis creeped up. He claimed that an older, fatter Striker stunt double was used to commentate Superstars last week. Maxine wanted to know who took Striker. They ran into Percy Watson and Alex Riley. Percy brought up Maxine giving Regal a foot massage and distracting from his match last week. Maxine started to suspect they were responsible. Riley asked why Curtis didn’t have a shirt on and Curtis said he didn’t need one. Weird. They then passed Tyson and Natalya and got suspicious of them too. They ruled out Justin Gabriel, as too soft. Titus O’Neil and Darren Young were talking further down the hall. Young had a coconut tree as a present for Tamina but Titus gave him some dating advice. After being caught lurking, Maxine accused Titus. Titus tried to kiss her and she got mad. Maxine got a message on her phone, from whoever was responsible for taking Striker, saying after Wrestlemania, they’d give back Striker providing they got what they wanted.
– Jey Uso d. Titus O’Neil in 5:42. Darren Young and Jimmy Uso both did commentary. Not sure who thought it’d be a good idea to put an Uso back on commentary. It’s not their strong suit. Jey started strong, but Titus rolled out before he could hit the superfly splash. Titus took control after the break. Jey fought back to set up the superfly splash again, but Titus got the knees up and won with the sky high. Afterwards, Tamina showed up and checked on Jey.
SUPERSTARS
– Heath Slater d. Alex Riley in 5:21. Striker and Stanford were the commentary team for the show. Actually made a good pairing. Riley set Slater up for the Final Score, but Slater escaped and won with a running neckbreaker.
– Justin Gabriel d. Tyson Kidd in 4:38. All babyface match here. In fact, these two are going to be teaming together in the Wrestlemania dark match. Back and forth exchanges early on, before Tyson gave Gabriel a russian legsweep into the dasher boards. Momentum continued to swing, until Tyson got caught slingshotting into the ring and Gabriel turned it into something resembling a powerbomb for the pin. Both men shook hands after the match, presumably to set up their Wrestlemania tag team.
SMACKDOWN
– Zack Ryder d. Drew McIntyre in 6:01. Striker and Josh did commentary, with King and Cole presenting segments from Axxess. Zack did an inset promo about Eve, saying it was thanks to her that he’d win at Wrestlemania as part of Team Teddy. Advantage swung early. Drew managed to ground Ryder for a while, but the crowd willed Zack back into the match. Zack got a near fall with the boot in the corner, then Drew used the referee to bait Zack into a boot of his own for a two count. Zack was able to escape a powerbomb and set up the Ruff Ryder for the win. Solid match.
– Big Show came out to cut a promo. Show said he’d had an extraordinary career and competed against some of the best superstars ever seen, but what he’d never done was have a Wrestlemania moment. Show talked about Cody’s plan to make a name off of him and said on paper it was a good one. He said that this time it would be different. Show said he felt in his heart, he wouldn’t be a choke artist, Cody would get choke slammed. He vowed to have his Wrestlemania moment on Sunday.
– Chris Jericho d. Kofi Kingston by submission in 7:17. Jericho was in arrogant mood, which soon left himself in trouble as Kofi ran wild and hit a baseball slide. But Jericho cut him off as he tried a springboard to gain the advantage. Jericho worked Kofi over and referred to himself as Best In The World when he had the advantage. However, Kofi made a comeback. Kofi set up for Trouble In Paradise, but Jericho ducked and went for the Walls Of Jericho. Kofi escaped and hit a crossbody for two. Kofi then got his knees up on a Lionsault and went for Trouble In Paradise again. But Jericho caught the leg and turned it into the Walls for the victory, before sending a message to Punk.