-Taped from Cleveland, Ohio
-Your hosts are of course various members of the Chikara roster and staff
-We begin with a ten bell salute for the sweet and feral Sapphire.
–Ophidian silences a laughing Kobald. He goes over his battle cry, one that will lead them to victory. Hasn’t worked out so well thus far. Delirious gave strict orders to make sure Ultramantis Black’s dreams are not fulfilled. They made Mantis suffer the previous night and cost them the tag titles. He dares Mantis to bring whomever into battle.
Match in Five Words or Less: Please Give Them A Name
Match Highlights: The last thing we saw in Chicago were the rudos costing Hallowicked and Ultramantis Black the victory in the main event. Interesting this match is the opener. Battle begins right away as the tecnicos waste no time. Brawl goes all about the ringside. PJ Drummond is the only person inside the squared circle. Ophidian begs off inside the ring as Mantis stalks him. Obaryion with a back elbow. assailANT with forearms. Clothesline misses. Spear by assailANT. Charging back elbow. Running back elbow. Obaryion sends him out of the ring. Blows from Wicked. Stomps in the corner. Obaryion sent head first into the turnbuckle. Ophidian dumps him out. Fire Ant with a single leg takedown. Firemen’s carry over. Fire Ant misses a charge but hits a headscissors as Ophidian is taken out of the ring. Kobald tosses Fire Ant. Mantis and Wicked double team Kobald. Sidewinder gets two as Obaryion and Kodama break the count. Tecnicos with ten punches in all four corners. Triple dives. Mantis goes for the Preying Mantis Bomb on Ophidian. Strike to the throat by Ophidian. Low bridge. Acecrusher guillotines Fire Ant’s throat across the middle rope. Kobald with choking. Rudos work Fire Ant over. Nice kick by Fire Ant on Kobald. Kobald takes him back to his team’s corner. Series of charges to the corner. Ophidian ends the attack with springboard double knees in the head. Fire Ant sends Ophidian up and over. Kobald grabs his leg. Fire Ant kicks him away and tags in Wicked. Boot on Kobald. Step-up boots for Obaryion and Kodama. Mongolian chops by Mantis on Kobald. Iconoclasm and neck snap. Swanton by Wick gets two. assailANT with a side slam on Kodama. Uranagi on Obaryion. Whip in the corner. Running splash. Four feet of fury. Ophidian tosses Fire Ant out. Swinging enzguri on assailANT. Cross body as Fire Ant reenters. Burning Down the House. Knee to the face by Obaryion. Boot and cosmic doom by Mantis. Kodama drives him down. Go 2 Sleepy Hollow by Wicked. Leapfrog on Kobald. Go 2 Sleepy Hollow hits. Ophidian with a Death Grip. Sitdown powerbomb by Wicked. Double team by Obaryion and Kodama. Wicked dives on Ophidian. Double clothesline by Mantis. Big cannonball to the floor. Wicked sends Ophidian’s head to the apron. Fire Ant hits a prone Kobald with a kick. Back drop from the top rope to the floor. Wicked and Mantis call for the end. Rydeen bomb hits. Mantis with a Regalplex. Catacombs of Abbadon. 1-2-NO! Batiri make the save. assailANT battles Kodama and Obaryion. O’Connor roll blocked. Drop toe hold into the knee. Kodama sends Fire Ant into Obaryion’s knee. Wicked comes back in. Whip reversed. Backcracker by Obaryion. Blockbuster by Kodama. Double knees by Ophidian and the rudos pick up the win.
Match Analysis: Pretty good start to the show as they tried to emphasize one of their biggest feuds right away. No feeling out process as they got the action started right away. Chaotic in a good way as they started similarly as their show, Hot Off the Griddle. I enjoyed this.
Winner (s)/Time/Match Rating/Entertainment Rating: Ophidian and the Batiri/13:50/***1/4/***
-The Devastation Corporation (Max Smashmaster and Blaster McMassive w/Sydney Backabella) vs. Roger Dorn and Rick Vaughn
Match in Five Words or Less: Not Exactly Major League
Match Highlights: Backabella is out to give two more gentlemen an opportunity. The selection is just a bit outside tonight as Dorn and Vaughn fare as badly as Wayne and Garth. They’d need rockets up their asses to win this match. I don’t how they didn’t lay off all this offense. Quick whip sends McMassive hard into Vaughn and Dorn. Double hip toss on one of them. Lariat by Smashmaster. Death Blow. See ya.
Match Analysis: Another squash match. It’ll be interesting to see how they fare in a real match. Based on what I’ve seen, I’m not confident in their abilities.
Winner (s)/Time/Match Rating/Entertainment Rating: Devastation Corporation/1:09/N/R/N/R
Match in Five Words or Less: No Donst
Match Highlights: Mat work to start. Shoulder blocks go nowhere. Hip toss by Hammermeier. Chops by Soldier Ant. Samoan drop. Hammermeier sent into the corner. Headbutt by Soldier Ant. Hammermeier sent into the top turnbuckle again. Soldier Ant sends him into the middle turnbuckle before putting him on top. Belly-to-belly suplex. 1-2-NO! Chop. Forearms by Hammermeier. Soldier Ant with a saluting forearm. Whip across. Charging back elbow. Snap suplex. Weak chops from Hammermeier. Leg kicks from Soldier Ant. Kick across the chest. He brings Hammermeier over by the leg. Half figure four leglock. Forearms and elbows in the corner by Hammermeier. Soldier Ant chops out. Punches in the corner. Hammermeier hits an atomic drop. Elbow hits. Forearms. Left handed lariat by Soldier Ant. Saluting headbutt. Chop on Hammermeier. Slap across the face. Side kick by Hammermeier. Russian leg sweep gets two. Running forearm. Chops as they go into the crowd area. Suplex on the hardwood floor by Hammermeier. They head back toward the ring. Soldier Ant gets bounced off the ropes and down. Charging forearm. Shoulder blocks in the corner. Whip in the corner. Clothesline follow-up. Soldier Ant sent into the turnbuckle. STO. 1-2-NO! Forearm exchange. Soldier Ant sends him down and wins the exchange. To the top rope. Saluting headbutt. 1-2-NO! Hammermeier appeared to move a little bit. Hammermeier shoves Soldier Ant. Boot out of the corner. They go head-to-head. Diving forearm by Hammermeier. Cover for two. Swinging neckbreaker but Soldier Ant kicks out at one. Chops as they go in the corner. Whip across. Hammermeier manages a boot. Good Night Neckbreaker. Hammermeier comes out the victor.
Match Analysis: I like Hammermeier the lackey heel who does tag team matches and undercard singles. Can’t say I’m a fan of the Hammermeier who wins singles matches against guys like Soldier Ant and seems to be receiving a push even as he’s getting physically and verbally abused by Tim Donst. It’s amazing how well Soldier Ant was being used in the first half of the year but is now being jobbed out in tag matches and here against Hammermeier. Very frustrating for the tecnico ants as a whole if you ask me. This was an okay match but not much to sink my teeth into.
Winner (s)/Time/Match Rating/Entertainment Rating: Jakob Hammermeier/11:10/**1/2/**1/2
Match in Five Words or Less: The Last Straw
Match Highlights: Quack has cost his team a number of matches in recent months and promised to take one of the Gekido members out on this night. Quack attacks right away and takes them out. Back drop on deviANT. Baseball dropkick. Tope con helo on both rudos. Jigsaw does nothing and is hesitant to attack. Blind tag. Gekido takes advantage of Quack and Jigsaw arguing. They recover and double team deviANT. Boot by Jigsaw on Shard. Whip. Elbow by Jigsaw. Quack hits a chinbreaker. Enziguri and Quack manages a small package for two. Leaping knee by deviANT. Backbreaker. He places his knee in Quack’s back. Shard comes in with a huge blow. Shoulder blocks in the back. He brings Quack out of the corner. Forearm on Quack. deviANT enters. Shoulder blocks in the corner. Back suplex. Sunset flip. Jigsaw hits a cross body. Shard tosses Jigsaw out as deviANT brings Quack toward the middle of the ring. Camel clutch. Series of elbow drops across the back. Into the corner for a forearm. Whip across and a forearm. Kick to the back. deviANT with a knee drop in the back. Double knees. Jigsaw knocked off the apron. Gekido take advantage of Jigsaw distracting Bryce Remsburg. Quack catches himself and exits. Jigsaw hits a sunset flip for two. Kick on deviANT. Whip in the corner. deviANT takes Jigsaw completely out of the ring. Quack goes for a Quackendriver but Shard stops that. Stomps and knee strikes in the back. Chancery by deviANT. Quack puts him on the apron. Sweep of the legs. Jigsaw with an enziguri on Shard. Quack hits a dive on both members. deviANT sent back in the ring. Kicks from Jigsaw. Whip across. Clothesline. Low kick. Brainbuster position but Jigsaw hits a gutbuster instead. That was different. Shard has his boot caught. Jigsaw hits a German suplex for two. Brainbuster blocked. Kick by deviANT. Kick by deviANT and brainbuster by Shard. Quack breaks the count. Quack, with blood coming out of his mouth, hits a Quackendriver. Arm submission but Shard gets out. deviANT gets a roll-up and gets a three count.
Quack brings down a celebrating deviANT and applies an ankle lock. Jigsaw yells at him for not focusing. He says this isn’t how mentors act.
Match Analysis: I’m sure Quack bleeding was inadvertent, but it sure made for an interesting visual based on his attitude and behavior. Very effective match in that it continued the tension between Jigsaw and Quack plus it got Quack in the ring with Gekido members once again. Solid work all the way around as Gekido worked over Quack’s back extensively in order to end him in the same way as their fallen compatriots were destroyed.
Winner (s)/Time/Match Rating/Entertainment Rating: deviANT and Shard/9:53/**3/4/***
Match in Five Words or Less: THAT’S A Disqualification?
Match Highlights: No Saturyne so they go to the hat to pick out an opponent. It’s not Alundra Blaze. It’s not Evan Karaigas. It’s the Mysterious and Handsome Stranger. And after what happened last night, the fight is on. No feeling out process here. Stranger takes off his hat in the entrance way. Off comes the badge. Immediate takedown and right hands. Stranger beats him Angelosetti all around ringside. Touchdown sent head first into the apron. Angelosetti tossed into the row of chairs. Angelosetti sent head first into a table. Stranger chokes him out with a t-shirt. Clubbering blow and chop by Angelosetti. Touchdown tosses the garbage can at him. Stranger gives chase. Back in the ring. Duck of a clothesline. Thesz press and right hands by Stranger. Clothesline sends Angelosetti back out. Boot to the face. Spinebuster sends Stranger into the side of the ring. Right hands by Angelosetti. Right hands as they go into the corner. Stomps. He says it’s good. Stranger with kicks of his own. Stomping a mud hole and waling it dry if you will. Stranger sent into the middle turnbuckle. Chop in the corner. Whip across. Stranger with a boot out of the corner. Angelosetti sends him front first into the buckle. Up and over acecrusher. Stranger hits a lariat. Another lariat. Remsburg says one more and Stranger is done because he’s not trying to win the match. Crowd doesn’t care. They want him to it again. A third lariat and Remsburg calls for the bell.
Stranger continues beating Angelosetti. Touchdown comes back. It’s a big old brawl. Security, officials, and Dasher Hatfield become involved. Huge dive between the middle and top ropes by Stranger.
Match Analysis: Excuivo de Castgo for this? Touchdown MURDERED a competitor the night before. Not much of a match as it’s obvious this storyline is just getting started. No reason to have a winner since Angelosetti has the cup and Stranger is too angry to simply go out and wrestle a match. Fun brawl while it lasted.
Winner (s)/Time/Match Rating/Entertainment Rating: Mark Angelosetti/6:24/**/**
Match in Five Words or Less: FIST Explodes
Match Highlights: Icarus brings in barb wire for whatever reason. Wrong promotion that runs in Turner’s Hall dude. Icarus tries standing with Gargano and Taylor. Crowd wants Icarus to leave the jacket on. Off comes the shirt. Taylor is wearing a “Worst in the World” shirt. Awesome. Dunkerton wants to walk out but reconsiders. Gargano asks Dunkerton to lay down. Feeling out process. Dunkerton with a leg submission and he lays back. Some surfing mixed in as well. Taylor introduces a lawn chair and a steel chair ends up in the ring too. Gargano goes to the bottom rope. Taylor tosses the chair inside. Dunkerton stands on it. Gargano shoves him. Drummond removes the chairs. Shot to the midsection and a series of strikes by Dunkerton. Running knee lift. Icarus lays down. Dunkerton won’t let Icarus give up on the match. They get into it. Icarus tells Dunkerton to come out. Icarus says they’re both going into the ring, but Dunkerton goes into the ring alone like a fool. Stomps from Gargano and Taylor. Gargano holds onto Dunkerton’s hair with his feet. Hairmare. Dunkerton sent into the corner. Double teams. Another hairmare by Taylor. Bodyslams by Taylor. They stomp away on Dunkerton. Dunkerton falls in the corner. Dunkerton with a series of punches. Sunset flip by Dunkerton. Gargano misses a punch. Sunset flip over and Dunkerton gets two. Leaping dropkick hits. Icarus tags in and lays down. Dunkerton breaks the count. Elbows for everyone. Icarus nails Gargano while trying to hit Dunkerton. He elbows Taylor. Dunkerton shoves him down. Taylor decks Dunkerton. Double kicks from Gargano and Taylor on Icarus. Blow to the back by Taylor. Jabs from Dunkerton. Spear in the ring by Gargano. Two count. Double team neckbreaker. Icarus dumps Dunkerton out of the ring. Icarus battles his stablemates. Double sliced bread. He puts his jacket on. WHAT?! Russian legsweep by Dunkerton on Taylor. Frog splash by Icarus gets two. Gargano superkicks Icarus. DDT into the Hurts Doughnut. Gargano covers and gets his team a second point.
Match Analysis: Icarus almost going babyface was mildly interesting, but I can’t say I’ve been into this aspect of the Wink/Chikarabrmetrics stuff at all. Dunkerton comes off very poorly as he continues taking the abuse and trying to make this work. Taylor and Gargano should be doing far more interesting things. The action was acceptable but nothing extraordinary.
Winner (s)/Time/Match Rating/Entertainment Rating: Chuck Taylor and Johnny Gargano/10:08/**1/4/**
-Donst talks Hatfield giving him one of his hardest matches ever. He talks about not having hair and not looking down on Hatfield anymore. Hatfield has an identity. Donst doesn’t. He tosses the shoelace away since it cost him everything he had. He again says karma doesn’t exist.
Match in Five Words or Less: Same As Last Night
Match Highlights: Donst actually has fans since they’re in Cleveland. Hatfield comes out in a Rick Vaughn jersey. That’s the second Major League reference of the night. Donst stays in the corner before the jaw-jacking begins. Slap by Donst. Donst continues talking and slaps him. Hatfield shoves him. Donst seemingly wants to take punishment. Sliding dropkick by Hatfield. Baseball dropkick sends Donst near the merch tables. Forearm as Donst sits in a chair. Swinging right hand. Uppercut slap. Open hand chop. Donst sits. Headbutt. Back elbows from Hatfield. Straps taken down. Another series of chops by Hatfield. Roll-up back in the ring gets two. Knee to the chest. Donst runs in from behind and hits an acecrusher. Donst brings Hatfield up and down on the mat. He rakes at the mask. Slap to the chest. Donst breaks the glasses Hatfield had given to a young fan. Backbreaker. Hatfield sent head first into the apron. Back in the ring. Crossface elbows while perched on the top rope. Hatfield sends Donst into the middle turnbuckle with his legs. Series of forearms. Hatfield hits a slingshot back suplex. 1-2-NO! Running back elbow. Hatfield locks in the figure four leglock. Donst takes them both completely out of the ring. The hold is obviously broken. Strike exchange. Hatfield sent head first into the apron. Tope suicida. Chops as Hatfield is tied in the ropes. Donst brings him out and sends him down. Spear. Hatfield reverses a gator roll. Tilt a whirl backbreaker. Swings him around. Jackhammer. 1-2-NO! Donst brings him over and locks in From Dusk ‘til Donst. Roll-up but Hatfield locks in the Chikara Special. Donst rolls him over for two. Hatfield gets the hold back. Donst finally kicks away. Hammermeier tries getting in the ring. Hatfield goes for Hammermeier. Donst nails him with the bag, same as last night. Three count. Donst wins.
Donst hits a sliding D after the match.
Match Analysis: A slightly better match than last night but it still feels like Donst is missing something from his character. The wrestling was solid, but the finish was almost exactly the same as last night.
Winner (s)/Time/Match Rating/Entertainment Rating: Tim Donst/10:07/**3/4/***
-Parker talks about taking a huge step toward the promised land. They want another tag team match since they can get a third point. Matthews talks about their feud with the Bravados. Strong words are tossed the Young Bucks way as well.
Match in Five Words or Less: Another Fun Atomico
Match Highlights: Matthews wants to fight. Immediate waistlock takedown on Matt. Shoulder tackle. Matt tears him down. Matthews is excitable. Parker tags with Lancelot. Parker literally wrestles circles around Lancelot before grabbing the arm. Lancelot grabs the arm. Parker tries getting out but Lancelot brings him down by the hair. Generico comes in. He matches up with Harlem. Nick crotches himself on the top rope. Bravados and Matt console him. Feeling out process. Armdrag by Generico. Boot. Up and over but Harlem brings him down by the mask. Parker calls for a timeout. Babyfaces meet in the corner. Remsburg allows it. Akuma and Nick are the final two members of their respective teams to come in. Each man works the arm. Akuma sends Nick down by the hair. Akuma does the same for all the rudos. Ironic given he doesn’t have hair. 3.0 double team Matt. Parker covers and gets two. Leaping knee drop. Jawbreaker by Matt. Harlem in with boots. Chop in the corner. Parker with a chop. Harlem with a jawbreaker of his own. Parker taken back into the rudo corner. Dropkick by Harlem. 1-2-NO! Nick tagged in. Stomp on Parker and a ring of his bell. Parker gets a boot up. Generico enters with a boot and two chops. Nick up and over to the apron. Chop and an armdrag to the middle of the ring. Dropkick. Generico battles out of a headlock. Nick sends Generico off the ropes. Pace picks up. Leg lariat by Generico. Two count. Akuma with a kick in the bum. Tilt a whirl backbreaker. Sitting abdominal stretch. Bravados take out the tecnico corner. Matt with a bodyslam and holds Akuma for seven seconds. Harlem tries to break the record but Akuma collapses on him. Rudos maintain the advantage. Akuma with a roll-up. Harlem kicks him away and here comes 3.0. They work over the Bravados. Drop toe hold and elbow drop for all four rudos. Akuma and Generico get in on the act as well when Matt is prone. Double team neckbreaker gets two. They go for the finish. Nick superkicks Parker. Assisted sliced bread on Parker. Double superkick on Parker. 1-2-NO! Double back elbows and elbow drops for Parker. Body scissors by Harlem on Parker. Back elbows. Matt enters with stomps. Heat segment on Parker continues. Parker begins punching his way to a comeback. Matt charges and runs into his brother’s enziguri. Generico yakuza kicks Matt immediately. Clotheslines on Harlem and Nick. Open hand slap and swinging DDT on Lancelot. Forearm to the back by Lancelot. Headscissors by Matthews. Akuma moonsaults the rudos on the floor. Blue thunder powerbomb by Generico on Matt gets two. Matt boots Generico in the face. Wheelbarrow quesa dora. Akuma breaks the count. Matt rolls out. Shoulder block and springboard facebuster by Nick. Knee by Akuma. He sends Nick down in a version of a 2K1 bomb. Nick with a back elbow. Parker tosses Nick into a waiting spear by Matthews. Chop by Harlem. Bicycle kick hits. Parker with a rolling forearm. Lancelot hits a lariat. Generico hits an exploder into the corner. Matt superkicks him. Matthews blocks. Takedown. Boston crab. Akuma puts Lancelot in one. Parker does the same to Harlem. Generico makes it four. All four rudos make it to the rope. Chop by Matthews on Matt in the corner. Matthews brings Harlem up and over. Running clothesline by Lancelot. Springboard acecrusher by Harlem. Nick with a running knee. Matt hits a cutter off the top rope. 1-2-NO! Lancelot and Harlem keep Generico and Akuma away. Double team enziguri. Superkick into the assisted German suplex. Count gets broken up. Bucks call for the end. Parker shoved down. Generico with a yakuza on Nick. Huge dive. Akuma drops Matt into his knees. Sweet Taste of Professionalism. Matthews pins Matt and gets the victory for the tecnicos. That means one half of 3.0 just pinned one of the campeones de parejas.
Match Analysis: Fun way to cap off the show and provide another preview of the Cibernetico. These types of matches are always good and a solid way to end B type Chikara shows. Quality action and effort by both teams.
Winner (s)/Time/Match Rating/Entertainment Rating: 3.0, Gran Akuma, and El Generico/24:13/***1/2/***1/2
The Verdict: We had a good open and main event. In between, the show quality ranged from okay to slightly above average. This felt like a B show with no real advancement of storylines but some decent enough work from everyone on the roster. Thumbs in the middle but this certainly isn’t a show that’s mandatory for your Chikara viewing pleasure.
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