This Week In WWE TV – March 18-24, 2013

This week: Is it Wrestlemania yet? Three weeks to go means last minute matches being added, stipulations being confirmed and win loss records getting some late boosts for those on the card, which isn’t terribly exciting but neccessary. Plus, Fandango finds a Wrestlemania dance partner (which is terribly exciting and neccessary), urn juggling, ankle breaking and an eye catching NXT main event.

RAW

– Cena came out. He encouraged everyone to pick a side between him and Rock. Cena said he was focused for Wrestlemania before The Prime Time Players interrupted, except Titus was dressed up as his ‘uncle’ Rufus. Rufus claimed Darren looked like Cena, so he should be on Cocoa Pebbles boxes. Young threatened to leave Cena crying on the ramp just like Wrestlemania last year. This was rather odd.

– John Cena d. Darren Young in 1:12. Cena won in a squash, albeit one which went through a commercial, with the AA.

– Ryback d. David Otunga in 1:27. Ryback won, also in a squash, with Shell Shocked. Henry came out afterwards but Teddy and Vickie stopped him. Vickie booked Ryback versus Henry at Wrestlemania, taking him out of the six man. Ryback gave Otunga Shell Shocked again in response.

– Fandango was supposed to face Khali. Fandango had a very elaborate entrance. Very awesome too. Fandango said “stretch” was too stupid to pronounce his name so gave Natalya a chance. She tried setting Khali on him but Fandango bailed and refused to wrestle.

– R-Truth d. Damien Sandow in 3:37. Before the match Sandow claimed the R in R-Truth stood for repugnant. Truth responded with a short poem. After Truth hit an axe kick, Sandow walked out to take the count out.

– Kaitlyn found Cody with The Bellas. She said they were welcome to him, which Cody seemed a little upset about.

– Undertaker came out and said Punk sealed his fate by making things personal. He warned Punk to give the urn back to save himself. Punk appeared on the screen doing a mock Paul Bearer voice. He reminded Undertaker that if he got counted out or disqualified at Wrestlemania, it still counted as a loss. Punk said Undertaker was the best at Wrestlemania but he was the best in the world 365 days a year. He said he didn’t answer to a higher power, he was one and said he’d endure whatever pain he had to to end the streak. Punk messed around with the urn throughout the promo and ‘dropped’ it, before saying no disrespect intended.

– Team Hell No! d. Primo and Epico (Kane pinned Epico) in 6:09. Kane was angry over what happened with Punk. Bryan took over for him and was cut off, before Kane ran through Primo. As he set up a chokeslam, AJ skipped out to try and distract him, but it didn’t work and Kane chokeslammed Epico for the win.

– Josh interviewed Jericho. He said he’d held the Intercontinental Title more times than anybody and winning it again would give him momentum before Wrestlemania. Fandango appeared and Jericho got his name wrong in a variety of ways. Fandango warned Jericho he would learn his name.

– Alberto Del Rio d. Cody Rhodes in 9:23. Momentum swung repeatedly before Cody hit a disaster kick off the barricade. Del Rio destroyed Cody with a gordbuster off the middle rope and made a comeback. Cody almost won with a moonsault, but Del Rio won with the cross armbreaker. Swagger attacked after the match and threw Ricardo out of the ring, before Del Rio fought back. A distraction from Colter allowed Swagger to recover and take Alberto out. Swagger then put the ankle lock on Ricardo and Ricardo sold like his ankle was broken.

– They announced Booker T going into the Hall Of Fame.

– Sheamus and Randy Orton d. Heath Slater and Drew McIntyre of 3MB (Orton pinned Slater) in 3:49. 3MB briefly got control over Sheamus, thanks to Jinder’s distraction. Orton then ran wild and Sheamus cleared the way with Brogue Kicks for Orton to beat Slater with the RKO. The Shield showed up afterwards but Big Show ran out to even the odds and The Shield backed down. Show pointed at the Wrestlemania sign to indicate he wanted to be Sheamus and Orton’s partner.

– Dolph Ziggler d. Kofi Kingston in 4:40. Kofi made his big comeback but Ziggler countered Trouble In Paradise. A distraction from AJ allowed Big E to wipe out Kofi and Ziggler finished him with a Zig Zag. Afterwards Kane and Bryan challenged them and AJ accepted for Wrestlemania.

– WWE Intercontinental Championship Triple Threat Match: Wade Barrett (c) d. The Miz and Chris Jericho in 9:18 to retain the title. This was your standard triple threat early on, tower of doom included. Jericho broke up a figure four with a lionsault. Miz then broke up the Walls and Jericho hit a Codebreaker. Wade tried to steal the pin but Jericho pulled him out and got a near fall. In the end Miz hit a Skull Crushing Finale but Wade rolled him up to steal the win.

– Lesnar and HHH had their Wrestlemania contract signing to end the show. Heyman came out with security. Heyman goaded HHH for a while and showed footage of HHH and Lesnar’s fight from 3 weeks ago, saying he had a way to top that at Wrestlemania. He threw a few fake stipulations out and brought up Stephanie. HHH dragged Heyman over the table and destroyed the security. He pinned Heyman down on the table and beat him up a little before signing the contract on his chest. Lesnar came out in a rage with a chair. HHH produced a sledgehammer and Heyman held him back, revealing the match at Wrestlemania would be No Holds Barred and HHH’s career was on the line.

MAIN EVENT

– Wade Barrett d. R-Truth in 5:55. Wade got the win with the Bull Hammer and bragged about winning on Raw, shoving Miz which lead to Miz chasing Barrett off.

– Striker interviewed Sheamus. He said Big Show would be a great ally to have, except he couldn’t be trusted. He decided he’d consider teaming with him, if sheep flew out of his arse.

– Layla and Natalya d. Alicia Fox and Aksana (Natalya submitted Alicia) in 4:11. Before the match, Alicia mentioned that she and Natalya had just returned from Rwanda and complained about having to put up with her talking about Khali. Natalya won with the Sharpshooter.

– The Usos d. The Primetime Players (Jey pinned Young) in 8:46. The PTP struggled early before Titus gave Jey a hiptoss into the turnbuckles. Jimmy then made a comeback and set up Darren for the superfly splash from Jey for the pin.

NXT

– Leo Kruger d. Justin Gabriel by submission in 9:57. Gabriel was more aggressive than usual here. Kruger grounded him for a while, before Gabriel escaped the London Dungeon and fought back. A thumb to the eye turned things around though. Gabriel got to the ropes to escape the London Dungeon once, but Kruger got it again for the win.

– Renee interviewed Audrey Marie. She said there was nothing Sasha Banks could do to stop her.

– Regal called Ohno to the ring to apologise for hitting him last week. Ohno explained he’d always admired Regal and tried to follow in his footsteps. They went over their backstory together and Ohno said he didn’t want his advice anymore. He said Regal had become a joke and started to mention Regal kissing Vince McMahon’s ass when Regal punched him. Ohno retreated and Regal seemed upset at what he’d done again.

– Paige d. Bayley by submission in 2:19. Paige won with a cloverleaf. Summer Rae teased a sneak attack afterwards, but Paige caught her and she backed off.

– Luke Harper d. Adrian Neville in 7:32. Harper controlled things early. Neville eventually managed to fight back and took out Rowan with a dive, before hitting a moonsault to the floor on Harper. When Neville went for the finish Bray and Rowan provided distractions though and helped Harper to win with a spinning clothesline. After the match all three teased attacking Neville, but Grey and Bo ran out to even the odds and help run the Wyatt Family off.

SUPERSTARS

– Antonio Cesaro d. Zack Ryder in 6:00. Striker managed to work a CHIKARA reference in about 10 seconds into the match. Cesaro went after Zack’s leg and even managed a one legged giant swing. After surviving Zack’s fight back, Cesaro won with the Neutraliser.

– Brodus Clay and Tensai d. Michael McGillicutty and JTG (Brodus pinned JTG) in 3:38. Tensai was cut off for a while, but Brodus ran through JTG and a double splash finished him off.

SMACKDOWN

– Miz hosted MizTV with Orton and Sheamus as guests. He asked who their partner would be at Wrestlemania. Orton said his choice was Big Show, but Sheamus said he didn’t trust him. Orton tried to convince him it was for the best, before Miz brought out Show. Show said he couldn’t stand either of them, but if they worked together not even The Shield could stop them. As Sheamus and Show argued, Booker interrupted and put them in a six man later to see if they could get along.

– Mark Henry d. Zack Ryder in 0:53. Henry squashed Ryder with the World’s Strongest Slam and gave him two more after the match, before Ryback came out. They squared off and Ryback knocked Henry down with a clothesline when they collided.

– Teddy told Booker he’d made the match between Henry and Ryback official. Booker and Teddy had a disagreement over whether Teddy worked for Booker or with him.

– Dolph Ziggler d. Kofi Kingston in 6:32. AJ joined commentary. A distraction from Big E aided Dolph. Kofi took out Big E with a dive, but Ziggler hit a fameasser on the floor and finished him off with the Zig Zag, again. After the match Big E gave Kofi the Big Ending

– Backstage Show and Sheamus continued to argue. Orton tried to get them to knock it off.

– Jack Swagger d. Chris Jericho in 9:03. Rematch from last week. Before the match, Colter said what happened to Ricardo was nothing compared to what would happen to Alberto at Wrestlemania. This was back and forth throughout. Jericho escaped the Patriot Lock before Fandango made his entrance, distracting Jericho. Jericho managed to recover, but Zeb distracted the referee and Fandango kicked Jericho as he went for the Lionsault, leading to Swagger winning with the Swagger Bomb. Afterwards, Fandango attacked Jericho and hit a legdrop off the top before ‘correcting’ Jericho on what his name was.

– Striker interviewed Big Show. Show said Orton was right and he was going to put his whole heart into this.

– Team Rhodes Scholars and Brodus Clay and Tensai went to a no contest. Cody and Sandow had The Bellas with them, the only women with enough beauty and intelligence to accompany them according to Damien. The Bellas and The Funkadactyls fought on the floor and the match got thrown out.

– Striker interviewed Sheamus and Orton. Sheamus claimed they were on the same page and they trusted Big Show as much as he trusted them.

– The Miz d. Antonio Cesaro by submission in 2:13. Wade did commentary. Miz won with the figure four and invited Wade in, but Wade just held up the title.

– Sheamus, Randy Orton and Big Show d. 3MB (Sheamus pinned Jinder) in 5:52. Sheamus stole Show’s open hand chops in the corner. Show responded by stealing Sheamus’s forearm combo in the ropes. 3MB briefly cut off Orton, before Show ran wild. Show knocked out Drew, but Sheamus had already tagged himself in and pinned Jinder with the Brogue Kick. As they argued, The Shield came out. Show, Orton and Sheamus began fighting among themselves, but focused long enough to force The Shield to back down.